lambchops's Full Review: Once Upon A... by Cinderella (Metal)
In this day and age, it’s very important that every band that ever gained any public following releases a “Greatest Hits” compilation. That is the case with Cinderella’s 1997 Mercury release entitled Once Upon A…. Now, as we all well know, these sorts of collections are often based on a limited amount of material. Since the band only released four albums within the limits of their career, this is a relatively sparse compilation.
And, as with scads of other screaming kids in the late 1980’s I fell in love with Cinderella. In retrospect, it could have been the hair and the pretty eyes. But, more likely I just liked Tom Keifer’s screaming, howling lead vocals. No, really, I actually liked his nearly mediocre vocal stylings. Now that I’ve aired that dirty little secret, I’ll return to the review and a little bit of information about Cinderella (for those who even give the slightest damn).
Cinderella debuted in 1986 in typical hair band fashion with ”Night Songs”. Sure, they didn’t look like anything special, but with Jon Bon Jovi in their corner they were headed for stardom. The band was made up of four guys from the beginning: Tom Keifer, Eric Brittingham, Jeff Labar, and Fred Coury. Their debut was never thought to be bad, but it was so much like the rest of the metal landscape that few fans took notice of the songs that had any potential.
I didn’t take notice until a few years later when they released what became one of my first album purchases, Long Cold Winter. Between their first two albums, Cinderella was able to score a few radio hits (based in part on their long-haired ‘bad boy’ image. And, to be quite honest, my favorite song of all from the band came from the aforementioned second album and was titled ”Don’t Know What You’ve Got (Till it’s Gone).
The band finally matured with the release of 1990’s Heartbreak Station. But, their career quickly came to a halt with the introduction of the Seattle sound and grunge music. Cinderella’s 1994 release Still Climbing was met with cold stares and deaf ears. So, what we are left with are a few songs and one of my first albums. Oh, and this darned Once Upon A Time… greatest hits compilation.
Consisting of fifteen of the band’s greatest songs, this album is alright. There are good songs and bad songs. Sure, their look and sound borders on a second-rate Motley Crue, and they are just too much like their contemporaries like Tesla, Britny Fox, Whitesnake, Winger, and White Lion, but these guys made an impression on a sixth grader’s heart. I still remember the sadness that would overwhelm we when no boys would ask the tall girl to dance to her favorite song of the time.
That aside, it’s time to look at this CD. The first track is the hard rockin’ ”Shake Me”. It’s a good track, and one of the better ones on the album (if that’s at all possible). Anyway, it’s a must listen so far as this album goes. If you remember the track, you’ll remember the poetic chorus Shake me all night she said shake me. The guitars are modestly interesting, but the sound is rather repetitive and is only good at times.
”Nobody’s Fool is a good song, and a smart one in which to place in the second slot. It’s a slow sort of song…a pseudo ballad of sorts. There’s Keifer’s voice beginning quiet and then quickly jumping to his more typical high-pitched yelp. It’s a good song, but of course it’s important to note that many people can’t stomach this genre much less vocals as abrasive and revolting as Keifer’s. Somehow, I still manage to like the band.
Next, we have ”Somebody Save Me”. It’s an okay track, but I don’t like the song per se. It’s just kind of boring. But, what comes fourth on the album is ”Gypsy Road”…one of the hidden gems from the band’s second album. I used to rock out in front of my full-length mirror to this one. Um….I didn’t just say that aloud did I? The tune is a bit more user friendly than some of the other tracks. I like the sound and Keifer’s vocals. It’s one of the better songs here.
Although, it’s the fifth song that overshadows all of the rest in my mind. The delicate, heartbreak-filled ”Don’t Know What You Got (Till it’s Gone)” is a great ballad. Sure, every hair band releases a song that shows their softer side, but this one leaves Keifer’s ear-piercing vocals intact. I feel myself spilling out emotion to the chorus. It takes me back to the painful Jr. High years…Don't know what you got till it's gone, Don't know what it is I did so wrong, Now I know what I got, It's just this song, And it ain't easy to get back, Takes so long. I understand the jist of the song, but like many of the others of the era, there is little real meaning.
”The Last Mile” is another mildly good track. It’s both tender and hard rockin’ all at the same time. These elements lead to a very girl-friendly track. I can almost envision throwing my training bra at the stage in perfect unison with the guitar riffs of this song. Maybe even the guitar solo.
As another ballad, ”Coming Home” is a great track. It got some radio play as a result of it’s easier-on-the-ears sound. Many people may not realize that this one actually belongs to the guys who formerly sounded like yowling cats. It’s got a nice, slow beat and even a slightly catchy chorus. A must listen so far as this album goes.
”Shelter Me” is immediately offensive to me. The country guitars mixed with Keifer’s lackluster vocals turn me in the other direction and force me to hit skip. I know that other people like the song, but not me (sorry to those I may offend…if anybody remembers the track besides me).
The title track from the third album ”Heartbreak Station,” is definitely more mature than it’s younger versions. The band sounds more confident and happier in the sound. Although, it doesn’t really impress me as being at all bankable for a band pigeonholed into the hair band category. Blah.
As the album progresses, it takes a serious turn for the worse. ”The More Things Change is only mediocre. I don’t like the song and I don’t like the vocals, oh and the guitars are boring. Nothing really offensive, just nothing good. ”Love’s Got Me Doin’ Time” seems as though Cinderella were trying to be a bit experimental infusing a different funky guitar. That funky guitar is the only redeeming quality in this otherwise icky song. I don’t like the band’s move into sort of southern rock as with ”Hot and Bothered”. In fact, that track sounds almost identical to the last one I mentioned. The album seems to get really repetitive. I can honestly see why this one was never popular. And why it made it’s way onto a greatest hits album is beyond me.
”Through The Rain” is an okay ballad. Sure, it’s really a cliché sort of track to this kind of album, but in the wake of some of the other crap, this song is almost a welcomed relief. ”War Stories” also bites for the same reason that some of the other southern-rock infused tracks do. Cinderella is nothing more than a hair band. They should have left their career back in about 1990. This track is revolting and unlistenable. The tambourine just puts it over the edge. Believe me.
”Move Over” is thankfully the final track of the album. If I remember correctly, this one got some radio play, but I never was particularly interested in it. Now I know why. I don’t like the somewhat simple beginning. There’s no reason to showcase Keifer’s vocals. They really aren’t good…at all.
So, now I know what drew me to Cinderella. There were some good eighties pretty metal tracks from the band’s first two albums. Beyond that, the band should have stopped. Instead, they continued on thus turning into rock geezers and shooting themselves in the collective foot. I still maintain that there are a few good songs here. There’s no question that they won’t be remembered as a band. Rather, their songs will always be on the ‘Monster Ballads’ collections for years to come.
I give this album 2.5/5 stars based almost exclusively on the merits of three or four good songs. Therefore, on the Epinions scale I’m giving it 3 stars. I will recommend the album conditionally. It’s not for everybody. In fact, the only people that will even remotely enjoy it will be people like myself…former hair band junkies of the late 1980’s. I know that there are a few of us left in the world.
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