Joey Green's Amazing Kitchen Cures: Interesting, Amusing and Helpful Remedies.
Written: Feb 04 '06 (Updated Feb 05 '06)
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Product Rating:
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Pros: Joey Green's Kitchen Cures are amazing and work!
Cons: Nothing. The book delivers what it intends in a straight-forward-manner with a touch-of-humour.
The Bottom Line: The author gives many remedies to common ailments using brand name items from the home that actually work. The book is both interesting and useful.
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| popsrocks's Full Review: Joey Green - Joey Green's Amazing Kitchen Cures: 1... |
Every year my wife and I exchange gifts of books. My wife often purchases books with facts that I can skim through and find interesting. Any kind of 'World Record' books or Ripley's Book could be wrapped and ready for me on Christmas morning. Other books like "John" bathroom books and such are perfect for me. Mindless reading for particular occasions. One of the reasons I favor this kind of book is because my wife and I spend many-a-night playing Scrabble in relaxed fashion. While one of us will scour the tiles and board for the best words and position, the other takes some time off the game and skims through these multi-fact books.
This year my wife was a bit more practical, not in expenditure but in a gift book that might actually be helpful. She purchased this book Amazing Kitchen Cures so that I might find something interesting read and also gain some practical ideas for home use.
I first browsed the book seeing that all the remedies and cleaners were brand name products. I'm not really sure as to why the author took this route and didn't use store name or no frills products, it seems to me the no-name products would do the same as the brand name, and saving a few cents for the reader.
Format and Contents
The book starts off with an A-Z list of conditions and remedies from the kitchen (and other rooms) that can cure or perhaps just ease the pain.
Well, the list doesn't quite get to Z. Here are the first four, another four from mid-book and the last four on the list of 120 ailments and conditions.
Acne, Air Fresheners, Allergies, Arthritis
Hangover Headache, Heartburn, Hemorrhoids
Vomiting, Warts, Wrinkles, Yeast Infection.
You are correct in thinking, this doesn't sound all that pleasant, but it's better than it sounds at first glance. Even so, when you open the book to find some of the other subjects you may want to close the book or perhaps open it thinking it as being "an accident on the side of the road". It may not be pretty but you sure will want to strain that neck for a peak. So it is with this book. Don't take this as a complete negative. There happens to be some good advice here for common ailments and situations.
Each of the Ailments, for lack of a better word, has a list of five to twenty products and how they may be used to help that ailment.
Acne was the first in the book. The list of products used for this condition goes like this.
Arm & Hammer Baking Soda
Colgate Toothpaste
Dickinson's Witch Hazel
Elmer's Glue All
Heinz White Vinegar
Hydrogen Peroxide
Kingsford Corn Starch and Real Lemon
Kiwi White Liquid Shoe Polish
Lipton Tea Bags
Listerine
Neosporin
Philip's Milk of Magnesia
Preparation H
Quaker Oats
Real Lemon
SueBee Honey and Band-Aid Bandages (used together)
Vics VapoRub
Visine
Next to each of these brand name products are the directions on how to use that particular product for acne.
The directions are very simple, just a paragraph and nothing special is needed beside that item in most cases.
Under a section dealing with how to make an ice pack there were a few suggestions. This may give an idea as to what the book suggests.
Ice Packs; Green Giant Sweet Peas. They conform to the contours of your body. Now here I understand the brand name. When I went and used ...Sweet Peas they were not...OK I'm just kidding here. There really is no difference of one bag of peas over another. One note. The authors covered their rears by mentioning safety and common sense throughout the book. In the case of using the frozen peas as an ice pack they say you can eat them when they defrost, but never after being refrozen. There are a number of places where the author makes a point of safety issues including seeing a doctor for some maladies that are more than what this book's remedies can handle.
Another suggestion for an ice pack that conforms to the body shape is using Orville Redenbacher's Gourmet Popping Corn and Ziplock Freezer bags. Pour one cup unpopped kernels into a small Ziplock Freezer bag and place it in the freezer to make an icepack that easily conforms to your body.
Authors note. Be sure they are Ziplock brand bags otherwise the kernels will start popping on their own. OK, just being silly again but pushin' home the idea that the brand names may not be all that important in most cases.
Smirnoff Vodka, Ziplock Freezer Bag and McCormick Food colouring. Pour 1/2 cup vodka with 1/2 cup water into Ziplock bag. add food colour for ID purposes. Freeze the contents, or at least try to. The water vodka mix will turn into a slush.
Author's note: Use it for the hangover caused by the rest of the bottle you drank the night before.
I know, you are wondering if Grey Goose Brand would work too. Actually, I'm thinkin' that you're thinkin', "No way I'm gonna waste good Grey Goose vodka on an icepack."
Scotch-Bright Heavy Duty Scrub Sponge. Ziplock... Saturate sponge, place in freezer.
Stayfree Maxi-Pads and Ziplock Freezer Bag. Saturate the pad, put it in the bag. Freeze.
Trojan Condoms. In a pinch, you can fill the condom with water. Tie it in a knot and freeze.
There are over two hundred trademark items used in the book. I did notice that many of the brand name items were useful for many ailments so it could be a good idea to get those few items and be prepared for the worse.
Some common "cure alls"
Altoids Peppermints
Bayer Aspirin
Bounce
Bubble Wrap
Colgate Toothpaste
Cool Whip
Heinz White Vinegar
Hydrogen Peroxide
Lipton Tea Bags
Listerine
Maxwell House Coffee
Master Card
Quaker Oats
Orajel
Preparation H
Smirnoff Vodka
Stay Free Maxi Pads
Tabasco Pepper Sauce
Zip Lock Freezer bags
You'll be surprised at how some products not listed here can help in you "Marriage Relations", or so they say. I'm sure most people can envision the use of Cool Whip and Hershey's Syrup. They also suggest a bit of an "interesting tingle" with the use of Halls Mentho-Lyptus. I do wonder however as to how many actually used Chloroseptic and Orajel to sort of "slow down the pace" for the male. It doesn't sound too appealing but "different strokes for different folks".
Bonus Section
Just in case all ailments and situations weren't covered they added a bonus section. One section gave information on how to protect clothing. For those interested in composting, many helpful hints are used using household products. Tricks on how to help cut flowers live longer and look better was a bonus in our household that constantly has new arrangements.
Wait! There's More!
I suppose I'm sounding like an info-mercial here. That's kind of what the book reminds me of, but it's fun, informative too.
In most sections are Strange Facts that help enhance what you have learned or just give a bit more information about the subject matter.
On the section regarding Flatulence we were given facts telling us that The average person passes gas eight to twenty times a day.
Many quotes and places in literature are noted that refer to "gas". Did you know that Benjamin Franklin published a book of bawdy essays titled, "Fart Proudly"?
Vitor Hugo gave information about...you know I'm gonna quit here. There's probably more information than we really need on some sections but like I said earlier. You're pulled in lookin' at "an accident on the side of the road."
The Author
Joey Green the author has made spectacle of himself, according to the books jacket, by getting "Jay Leno to shave with Jif Peanutbutter" and "He has been seen polishing furniture with Spam on NBC Dateline, cleaning a toilet with Coco-cola and washing his hair with Reddi-wip, in People. Green was a contributer to National Lampoon.
Last Thoughts
The book's almost 400 pages, though having a slightly off beat side to it, are actually is very useful. I was able to find a few remedies for myself. I must say that I know the section on "Bad Breath" was helpful. Just which product do you think helped out. Alka-Seltzer, Master Card, a combination of McCormick Ground Cinnamon, Smirnoff Vodka and Mr. Coffee Filters or Tang? There were about seven more remedies too. Ans. Tang
It may seem from this review that some of the ailments may have been treated like a few boys in their tweens talking about constipation, bed wetting and hemorroids, but the actual text is pretty dry in its delivery, despite the author's humour laden history.
I did have a smile on my face for many of the remedies but here again they did sound practical and that they would work. The author does go for some dry humour in the Strange Facts sections.
Though the book can be used for practical use of kitchen products as remedies for common ailments, it's also an interesting and fun read.
The book is well organized with ailments listed in alphabetical order. Look for Breast Feeding, Insect Bites, Skunk Odor, Snoring or Toothache. Next to it is the page number. Go to it and before you know it, you'll be reachin' into the kitchen closet for your remedy...and it just may work.
Recommended:
Yes
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